Find Ways Not To Keep Your Words

Find Ways Not To Keep Your Words

Bro Charlie Chan | 15 February 2026 | Matthew 23:16–22

In Matthew 23:16–22, Jesus continues His rebuke of the scribes and Pharisees, exposing a subtle but dangerous hypocrisy — people who appeared religious but used clever wording to avoid keeping their promises.  He said:

“Woe to you, blind guides, who say, ‘Whoever swears by the temple, it is nothing; but whoever swears by the gold of the temple, he is obliged to perform it.’ Fools and blind! For which is greater, the gold or the temple that sanctifies the gold? … He who swears by the temple, swears by it and by Him who dwells in it. And he who swears by heaven, swears by the throne of God and by Him who sits on it.”
(Matthew 23:16–22 excerpt)

They were not rejecting oaths outright — they were redefining them.  They created categories to escape responsibility.  By manipulating language, they searched for loopholes rather than truth.  Jesus calls them “blind guides” because they were leading others into dishonesty while appearing religious.

This spirit did not disappear in the first century.  It lives whenever believers look for ways not to keep their word.

Jesus had already given the standard:

“But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.”
(Matthew 5:37)

There is no middle ground. “I’ll try.” “Maybe.” “We’ll see.” Vague language often becomes an escape route. When we refuse to speak clearly, we trap ourselves — and slowly erode trust.  Hypocrisy in speech begins not with lies, but with ambiguity.

The Danger of Hypocrisy in Our Words

Hypocrisy is not just telling lies; it is appearing righteous while avoiding responsibility.  Jesus warns:

“But I say to you that for every idle word men may speak, they will give account of it in the day of judgment.”
(Matthew 12:36)

God hears every word we speak.

True righteousness is integrity of heart and speech:

“Lord, who may abide in Your tabernacle?
Who may dwell in Your holy hill?
He who walks uprightly,
And works righteousness,
And speaks the truth in his heart.”
(Psalm 15:1–2)

When Christians do not keep their word, our witness suffers.  People doubt our faith because they cannot trust our speech.  Integrity in words is not small — it reflects the character of Christ.

Ten Ways We Avoid Keeping Our Word

The lesson highlighted common patterns that expose the heart.

We sometimes SPEAK TOO QUICKLY, promising before thinking:

“It is a snare for a man to devote rashly something as holy, and afterward to reconsider his vows.”
(Proverbs 20:25)

Jesus teaches wisdom:

“For which of you, intending to build a tower, does not sit down first and count the cost…?”
(Luke 14:28)

Pause. Count the cost. Think before committing.

We sometimes use VAGUE LANGUAGE to leave ourselves an escape route — words that sound committed but allow room to withdraw later. 

Yet Scripture calls us to clarity: “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one” (Matthew 5:37).

To overcome this, we must learn to speak plainly and truthfully, without hidden exits.

The church is a hospital for the spiritually sick.  We all stumble and sin, and we regularly need God’s forgiveness.  Honest speech is part of that humility — admitting weakness rather than masking it with careful words.

We sometimes hide behind religious language, MAKING SPIRITUAL EXCUSES, to avoid personal responsibility. Yet Scripture speaks plainly:

“When you make a vow to God, do not delay to pay it… Better not to vow than to vow and not pay.”
(Ecclesiastes 5:4–5)

The account of Ananias and Sapphira in Acts 5 reinforces this sobering truth. Their sin was not in the act of giving, but in pretending—professing devotion while withholding honesty. The lesson is clear: it is better not to promise at all than to make a vow falsely before God.

We FORGET PROMISES through carelessness which leads to broken trust:

“In whose eyes a vile person is despised, But he honours those who fear the Lord; He who swears to his own hurt and does not change.”
(Psalm 15:4)

While some forgetfulness is unintentional—such as the natural decline of memory in old age—we are still responsible for our word.  As practised by a late elderly member of the church, to ensure he kept his word, he would place physical reminders in his shoes.

We must treat Commitments as sacred.

We CHANGE WHEN IT BECOMES INCONVENIENT.  We keep our words only when it is easy.

“And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart.”
(Galatians 6:9)

Doing good is not always convenient.  Keeping our promises is not always comfortable. Serving others is not always easy.  Yet faithfulness is measured not in comfort, but in consistency.

There was a church that decided its food bank would be open to anyone — “Take as you need.” It was a food-for-the-poor programme.  The preacher stayed in the church building so that when people came seeking benevolence, someone would be there to help.  When access was restricted, he hammered off the locks so the needy could receive what had been promised.  He believed that when you say you will help, you help.  When you say it is for the needy, you make sure the needy can receive it.

He understood a simple but powerful truth:
You must deliver what you promise.

No excuses.
No conditions added later.
No “ifs” and “buts.”

Faithfulness means we do not grow weary in doing good. We do not retreat when it becomes inconvenient. We do not rewrite our promises when they cost us something.

We deliver what we promise — because our word reflects our character, and our character reflects Christ.

There was an incident where a female member was disfellowshipped because of adultery. She later took the church to court, arguing that the matter should not have been spoken of publicly.  The church faced financial consequences. Funds had to be raised. Payment had to be made.

But the principle remained clear: obeying God is more important than avoiding discomfort. Upholding holiness is more important than protecting reputation.  Truth must not be silenced simply because it is costly.

We do not choose obedience only when it benefits us.  We choose obedience because it is right.

We BLAME CIRCUMSTANCES instead of owning our words:

“So then each of us shall give account of himself to God.”
(Romans 14:12)

That is why accountability is uncomfortable.  It is not pleasant when someone asks for receipts, documentation, or proper records. Some respond, “Cannot find the documents,” or “It’s not available.” Yet proper standards require evidence. Integrity requires transparency.

In accounting, details matter. Records matter. Compliance matters.

And if we are required to give an account before men, how much more before God?

One day, we will stand before Him — not with explanations, not with circumstances, not with shifting blame — but with our own account.

We must be careful not to create situations that require excuses later.

Excuses may satisfy people.
They do not satisfy God.

Before Him, we must own our actions, our words, and our responsibilities — honestly and without deflection.

We fall into PEOPLE-PLEASING, saying yes to be liked then fail to follow through :

“For do I now persuade men, or God? Or do I seek to please men? For if I still pleased men, I would not be a bondservant of Christ.”
(Galatians 1:10)

Approval from God must outweigh approval from men.

We MINIMIZE SMALL PROMISES, thinking only big vows matter:

“He who is faithful in what is least is faithful also in much…”
(Luke 16:10)

If we cannot keep small commitments, we cannot be trusted with greater ones.
Faithfulness begins in the little things.

If we cannot handle the small responsibility, how will we ever carry the bigger one?

Our character is revealed in the ordinary. We often judge a person not by grand declarations, but by simple consistencies.  If someone cannot meet even the minimum standard — cannot attend meetings, cannot follow through on basic duties — how can they be entrusted with more significant responsibilities?

Whatever small thing we promise to do for the church — just do it.
Do it without reminder.
Do it without complaint.
Do it because it is right.

Faithfulness in little things prepares us for greater service in God’s kingdom.

We follow WORLDLY HABITS, where broken promises are normalized:

“And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind…”
(Romans 12:2)

In the geopolitical and economic landscape, promises often appear meaningless.  Treaties are made, laws are enacted, commitments are announced — yet many seem to carry little weight. World leaders shift positions. Policies change overnight. Trust erodes.

But we must ask ourselves:
What is happening in the world — and what is happening in the church?

The standards of the world must not become the standards of God’s people. When dishonesty becomes common outside, it must not become comfortable inside.

The world may excuse dishonesty — God does not.  We must live by God’s standard of truth.

Finally, we REFUSE TO ADMIT WRONG.  Pride resists apology.  I have never apologise in my life, I am always right – some may think.

“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”
(1 John 1:9)

Integrity is restored when humility replaces pride.  We must confess and make things right.

Humble ourselves.

How To Overcome This Hypocrisy

First, fear God’s presence in every word. Jesus reminds that every oath ultimately involves God (Matthew 23:21–22). When we remember God hears us, our speech becomes careful. 

There is no private corner where God does not hear.  We may speak behind closed doors, or gossip about our bosses when they are not present — but God is present.  He hears all things.

Second, develop a heart of integrity. Psalm 15 describes the one who dwells with God — one who keeps his oath even when it hurts. Integrity means doing right even when it costs.

Third, speak less and mean more.  There is a Malay proverb: “Kurang cakap, lebih tindak” — less talk, more action. It is simple wisdom, but deeply true.

As we grow older, we often learn this lesson.  Experience teaches us not to speak too quickly, not to promise too easily, not to comment on everything. Over time, we realise that words carry weight — and careless words can cost us.

It is better to speak fewer words and fulfil them, than to speak many words and fail to deliver.

“So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath.”
(James 1:19)

Fewer promises often lead to greater faithfulness.

Fourth, repent quickly when we fail:

“For we all stumble in many things. If anyone does not stumble in word, he is a perfect man…”
(James 3:2)

Humble confession restores trust.

In business, people choose to work with you for three simple reasons: they must know you, they must like you, and they must trust you. Trust is the foundation of the other two. Without trust, relationships weaken.

That is why we must say what we mean and mean what we say.

Some may think being late for an appointment is normal. But it is not. Punctuality communicates respect. In the world of selling and negotiation, being late already places you at a disadvantage. Psychologically, you have surrendered ground before the conversation even begins.

Small disciplines reflect bigger character.
Consistency builds credibility.
Humility restores trust when we fail.

Fifth, follow Christ’s example:

“For all the promises of God in Him are Yes, and in Him Amen…”
(2 Corinthians 1:20)

We are agents of God.  We must be careful how we conduct ourselves in this world.

Jesus always kept His word. If we belong to Him, our lives should reflect His character.

The Power of a Trustworthy Life

Imagine a church where every member’s word could be trusted. Families would be stronger. Relationships deeper. The witness to the world clearer.

Like the song “ Christ for the world we sing”

Integrity in speech is powerful testimony. When Christians keep their word, people see Christ in us.

Conclusion

Jesus’ warning in Matthew 23:16–22 calls believers away from manipulation and toward simple honesty. No manipulation. No double talk. No excuses. Just a life where our “Yes” truly means yes.

“He who walks with integrity walks securely, but he who perverts his ways will become known.”
(Proverbs 10:9)

Trust & Obey for there is no other way

The call is personal:

Where have I been careless with my words?
Have I made promises I have not kept?
What step of repentance do I need today?

Hypocrisy searches for escape routes.
Integrity searches for obedience.

Let us pray for hearts of integrity, so that our words honour God and build trust with others — and so that when people listen to us, they hear not manipulation, but the steady echo of Christ Himself.